For the Love of Draco
by puppyshipper
Summary: I am almost certain that he loves me. But it is not the kind of love that keeps you up all night long... No, the love that Draco has for me is the love of a friend and nothing more... Pansy's PoV PansyDraco HarryGinny HarryDraco my first EVER fanfic!


I love Draco. I have loved him, for as long as I can remember, and will continue to love him for years to come. My love for him has been the only consistent thing in my life. However, I am not writing this to tell of my love for him, but rather his love for another. Don't get me wrong, there is no doubt in my mind that Draco loves me. Of course, after all the years we have spent together, I am almost certain that he loves me. But it is not the kind of love that keeps you up all night long, thinking of that person and nothing else, or the kind that when you see that person walk through the door, your heart skips a beat. No, the love that Draco has for me is the love of a friend and nothing more.

Ever since we were little, Draco and I knew we were to be married. It was what our parents wanted, and we had grown to accept it as a pureblood tradition. It wasn't a matter of falling in love, but of making a suitable and proper heir for the family. That isn't to say that both of us didn't try to love each other. During our years at Hogwarts we dated each other several times, though never officially breaking it off. In those years I grew extremely fond of Draco, but Draco stayed detached. Try as I might, I found that I couldn't make his feelings mirror mine. But even though he did not seem to share my feelings he never dated another while at Hogwarts.

Our relationship has never been like others, and over the years I've come to accept that. We never hold hands while walking down the street, or kiss in public, or give any sort of out ward expression of our feelings. Most people see this as the Malfoy way of doing things, but it isn't so. If anyone had seen Lucius and Narcissa at any sort of party they would know otherwise. There had always been some sign of their love for each other, whether it was just their arms linked together, or a simple hand upon the shoulder. No, lack of public display of affection is not the Malfoy way of doing things.

Before the war began, both Draco and I knew we would be on the light side. Draco because he couldn't possibly complete the task he was given, and I because I couldn't imagine my life without him in it. My family had always tried to stay neutral, so my choice had very little effect on my home life. But when seventh year began, it came as a great shock to everyone when I announced myself a loyal follower of The Boy Who Lived, Slytherin's supposed enemy.

No one knew of Draco's whereabouts. Not a single one of us had seen him, or Professor Snape, since the end of last year, when the Death Eaters stormed the castle- I still shudder when I think of what happened to that Weasley boy, Bill. Everyone thought Draco was still faithful to the Dark Lord, and as all of Slytherin followed their house leader, even in his absence, I was shunned. As Slytherin followed Draco, all the other houses followed Harry, who hadn't come back that year. Still believing that Harry would never be seen with me, or any other of my house members, they too passed by me without even a glance.

That year I grew extremely close to Hermione and Ginny. None of the other girls in the houses would be seen with me, much less trust me enough to become my friend. The boys weren't much better. Even Ron didn't trust me that last year at school. Hermione, Ginny, and I ate our meals by the lake, even on cold winter days, when many warming charms were needed. We saw no need to eat in a room still full of house rivalries that should have been long forgotten.

Of the two, Ginny became what could be considered a best friend. Harry had left her behind, just as Draco had left me. We bonded over our love for those two, staying up until the early hours of the morning talking about the boys we loved dearly, with our devotion to them always in place. If only we had known then what I know now.

I can't say how long this has been going on; a few months, a year, several years. The amount of time doesn't seem to matter anymore. I don't think about the time length, but rather how the relationship started. Neither Draco, nor Harry will talk about the night that Dumbledore died, but I'm sure it has something to do with that.

Almost immediately after the war ended, Draco and I were married. It was no longer because of our parents though. During the war both Draco's and my parents were killed. We were married roughly a year after my graduation from Hogwarts, as an attempt to keep our long lasting friendship surviving. We had spent the whole year apart while the war went on, and didn't wish to completely lose the connection we had shared before. Draco needed me there, and so I accepted, hoping that he could grow to love me as I loved him. Not long after that Harry and Ginny were wed.

Five months ago was Hermione's and my five year Hogwarts reunion. Although neither Draco nor Harry graduated, both were there. That was the first time I ever saw any sign of something between them. Perhaps it was the look on Draco's face as Harry walked through the door, or the way Harry's eyes seemed to shine brighter when he caught sight of Draco. Not the way two friends react. Harry had of course brought Ginny along, and she smiled as the two directed themselves toward us, Harry to see Draco, and Ginny to converse with me. Almost immediately after greeting each other, the two walked off, leaving Ginny and I to talk. No one found it odd. After the war had ended, it became known that Harry and Draco had become friends. So no one had ever questioned it when the two went off on their own for whatever the reason may be. But as they walked away, I noticed something was different. It was the never ending glances, the smiles they tossed back and forth, and the lack of space between their bodies as they exited the Great Hall. However I did not want to think about it, and quickly tried to shove the odd occurrence out of my mind.

After that night, I couldn't help but observe their actions more closely, and I began to notice things I had never noticed before. How they rarely invited Ron along on their excursions, how simple things like running to the store took hours of time, and how they never did the things that they would do with any of their other friends. The only normal thing they did together was play Quidditch, and they rarely even did that.

I had never before noticed the sudden cleanliness in appearance after Draco returned from an outing with Harry. True, Draco was always one to be well groomed, but not to the extent that he was after he and Harry spent a few hours alone. On several occasions Ginny and I went to lunch together, and no matter what, both boys would always argue until they got to stay home together. After lunch, Ginny and I often decided to do some much needed grocery shopping. When we returned, neither of the boys would be in site, and we would have to call them several times before they would come help put the bagfuls of food away. Their eyes would always linger on each other more than us girls, and their hugs were always a bit too long. Everything pointed toward the conclusion I prayed didn't exist.

Two months ago while changing the linins on our bed, I found a men's shirt in the covers. I didn't recognize the shirt at all, but knew instantly by smell that it belonged to Harry. He always doused himself in the same cologne. I knew then that I couldn't possibly ignore what I had pieced together over the past few months, but I had no time to think about it. We were to have a sort of Muggle barbeque at Harry's house that night. All of our friends would be there, and I couldn't allow what I had found to ruin the night for everyone. After dinner, Draco and Harry vanished, as they had always done, and I couldn't help but feel a sharp pain in my chest every time someone nonchalantly mentioned their disappearance. Several times after they left Ginny asked me if I was alright, and every time I said yes, knowing that if I told her all four of our lives would be ruined.

My relationship with all three of them changed that night. I stopped believing that Draco and I were in some sort of fairytale relationship, and scorned myself for not realizing what was going on from the beginning. I never looked at Harry in the same manner again. Before I had seen him as a wonderful man, so supportive, almost like a brother, but now I didn't know what to see him as. How I wanted to hate him sometimes. Yet despite everything, I couldn't hate him. I began to distance myself from Ginny, knowing that our friendship was now centered around a lie. The thing that had brought us together was now slowly pushing us apart.

I keep hoping and praying that I'm wrong in what I've discovered. That all of this is just a big misunderstanding. Over the last month I've continued to notice more and more odd behaviors the two have. It surprises me that neither Ginny nor Hermione has noticed. However it is possible that they have, and this is just their Gryffindor loyalty shining through.

I cannot explain why I haven't yet brought it up to anyone. Whenever I come close to confronting the boys, I always seem to find some excuse to keep their secret to myself. Perhaps it's the way Ginny talks of Harry, or how Harry's eyes always seem to glow when he and Draco are together. But most likely its how Draco always seems to be happy when Harry is around. All his life, Draco has been burdened with hate, and sadness. I've never seen him as joyful as he is around Harry. Having known Draco all my life, I couldn't possibly take that happiness away. It's not a matter of who is making him happy, but the fact that they are doing it in a way I never could. I love Draco, more than anything in this world, and I would do anything for him. Draco loves Harry. If Harry loves Draco back, who am I to get in the way of that?


End file.
